Our Approach
You’re unique. And you deserve care that fits your individual challenges, strengths, and needs.
After working with hundreds of shy introverts, we know that no two cases of social anxiety are the same. That’s why our team of experts prides itself on adeptly responding to each client’s unique goals and ever-changing needs.
Going beyond traditional talk therapy, we combine evidence-based approaches with compassionate, cutting-edge techniques. Overcoming social anxiety requires insight and action; we take an integrative approach that balances challenge with soothing and talking with doing.
Yes, we may ask you about your childhood. But we’ll also teach you social skills, role-play anxiety-provoking conversations, and help you set concrete goals. We’ll also lovingly challenge you to take small but manageable risks, which is the key to overcoming social anxiety.
Here are a few of the approaches our team of highly skilled anxiety experts will use to support you:
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
Research indicates that cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is one of the most effective forms of social anxiety treatment. A highly structured approach, CBT seeks to correct the distorted thinking patterns that underlie and perpetuate social anxiety. Cognitive behavioral therapy may also include exposure therapy, which utilizes role-playing and social challenges between sessions to expand your comfort zone.
Our clinicians utilize and train in CBT methods on an ongoing basis. We happily provide cognitive behavioral therapy in both individual and group settings.
Drama & Expressive Arts Therapy
Drama and expressive arts therapies such as music, art, and dance therapy provide a creative alternative to cognitive approaches such as cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). If you spend much of the day ruminating about your flaws and mistakes, having a safe place to express yourself freely can feel immensely relieving.
Of course, you may feel anxious about “looking silly” and worried your therapist will judge your “performance.” Rest assured that no creative training or skill is required to reap the benefits of drama & expressive arts therapies. It may sound counterintuitive, but your fears indicate that drama and expressive arts therapy may be an ideal approach for you. Where else can you find a safe, supportive environment to face your fears of being authentically you?
In that way, drama and expressive arts therapies serve as exposure therapy, one of the gold-standard treatments for social anxiety. Through drama, art, or other creative exercises, you will be “exposed” to the things that scare you (rejection and humiliation) in ways that you can handle and integrate. That will, in turn, expand your comfort zone.
Through drama and expressive arts therapies, you can gradually learn to connect with others playfully, joyfully, and confidently.
Mindfulness Training
Numerous studies have proven the effectiveness of mindfulness-based therapies for the treatment of social anxiety.
Mindfulness practices seek to train the mind's focus, attention, and flexibility to promote greater well-being. They can include seated or moving meditations, yoga, creative practices like drawing, or paying close attention to the here and now.
For shy folx, mindfulness offers straightforward, concrete tools for relaxing, reducing overthinking, and increasing confidence in social situations.
Trauma Therapy
Some shy individuals started to fear rejection and humiliation after experiencing something excruciating. You may have struggled to feel loved and safe as a child thanks to growing up with an overly critical parent or being bullied by your peers. In adulthood, bosses, friends, or your romantic partner may have targeted or rejected you. And if you’re a BIPOC, AIP, woman, LGBTQIAP2S+, immigrant, differently abled, or neurodivergent, you may understandably struggle to feel secure in our unjust society.
Trauma sets up shop in the body, creating heightened levels of fear and hypervigilance. For that reason, cognitive and talk-oriented approaches like cognitive behavioral therapy aren’t always sufficient for healing social anxiety. In these cases, our clinicians utilize approaches designed to resolve the traumas that underpin our clients’ shyness. These include eye-movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR), somatic modalities, and drama therapy, all of which aim to release stored trauma from the body and rediscover calm and confidence.
Social Skills Training
If you experience social anxiety, chances are you feel like everyone except you got the How to Not Be an Awkward Human manual.
Knowing how to relate skillfully to others in various settings builds self-confidence, which is why we’re passionate about teaching our shy clients social skills from a neurodiversity-affirming lens.
Through social skills training, you can learn how to skillfully connect with others by improving your:
Conversation skills
Listening skills
Body language
Flirtation skills
Humor and playfulness
Ability to build an emotional connection
Assertiveness skills
Your social anxiety therapist can teach you research-validated techniques for connecting well with others. In addition to reviewing these approaches verbally, they’ll enhance your learning through skill drills and role-plays. They’ll also help you implement what you’re learning between sessions so that you fully integrate your new social skills.
Our team is passionate about offering neurodiversity-affirming care, so we don’t center neurotypical social skills. Depending on your goals, we’ll teach you neurotypical skills, neurodivergent skills, or both. We’ll also support you to think through the pros and cons of masking (i.e., acting like a neurotype different from your own to fit in), particularly if you’re autistic, an ADHDer, or otherwise neurodivergent.
If you find yourself avoiding dating, clamming up when you see someone attractive, sweating uncontrollably on dates, or ruminating endlessly after dates, we’ve got you. Thanks to the work we do through our sister clinic, Bay Area Dating Coach, all of our therapists are also dating coaches.
Dating coaching and therapy provide action-oriented, solution-focused approaches to improving your love life, including:
Clarifying what a "typical" dating relationship progression looks like.
Understanding best practices for communicating before & after dates.
Systematizing your dating plan so that you can relax and focus on making deep connections.
Developing a self-care plan that enables you to weather rejection and search long enough to meet your match.
Online dating profile, picture, & messaging guidance.
Improving your dating skills, including flirtation, conversation skills, and asking for what you want.
Developing secure attachment.
Healing any internal blocks that keep you from finding a healthy relationship.
Offering online and in-person services